Have you ever had a rebound before? Have you gotten into a relationship just for the sake of getting over your ex? Look at Jess story if it relates with yours.
Jess will you be my girlfriend he asked shyly awaiting an answer. Jess looked him in the eye wondering if she could say yes knowing the truth and, at the moment, she thought, and her words came out, “Paul, I can’t”.
Paul looking confused and asked why then Jess began to speak, “it’s because I know you ain’t over her, I don’t want to be dating you knowing you still think of her and you will begin to compare both of us.
You will keep telling yourself you love me more which isn’t true and when we mistakenly bump to her, you were trying to make her feel jealous because you have feelings for her.
I see the way you look at her Paul, that’s not a look when you’re over someone, and imagine you guys reconcile wouldn’t you want to get back with her. If I’m lying correct me, tell me it’s not true because I see the signs every time and I try to tell myself otherwise, Paul looked at her but couldn’t say a word.
Tears began running down her face because she wished deep down that she wrong, but he just looked at her without denying a single thing. So, she continued and said “sincerely I don’t want to be your rebound or your second choice when you get over her, and you’re sure about us then I’ll be your girlfriend.
“But Jess, I love…” Paul said in a whisper, but Jess cut him off before he could complete his words. “I’m not sure you even believe those words yourself”, and she walked away. Paul stood there because every word she said was true and he couldn’t chase her because she was right nothing he said could change things.
Who are you in this story? Are you Jess who knows she isn’t the one in the heart of someone she loves or are you Paul who still loves his ex but want to be in a relationship with someone that he is not sure he loves?
If you’re Jess in this story, be as bold as she was and ask, even though she knew it would hurt, she still did it and walked away, follow her example. But if you’re Paul well I have a word or two for you, instead of jumping into another relationship heal, try to get over your ex.
A rebound hardly works and even if it does it take time for you to love the person you’re with, and that’s not fair to either you or the person. Heal, take all the time you need, don’t try to get back at your ex or go into another relationship to feel loved. It’s very unhealthy, so make the right decision and leave, yes it might hurt but its better than pretending to love them.
Once you are out of it, do the next step “getting over your ex”, hard but I know you can do it. Now stay posted because that is what is next and I’ll help you through it.